Pine Cones and Holly are Not Good to Eat
by Wingleader Sora Jade
Summary: Ranma X-over. The YGO gang gets snowed in over Christmas and New Years with me, KaTyA, Li, and Hotaru. Chaos insues when the Ranma gang arrives. *Chap 8 up* ON HIATUS!!! Happosai arrives, and is (amazingly) easily gotten rid of.
1. Head Banging Yamis

Pine Cones and Holly Are Not Good to Eat 

by WSJ 

WSJ: *grins* Happy Holidays minna-san! *waves from her possition on a step ladder next to a huge Christmas tree* 

In honor of the season, she'd changed clothes. Instead of her normal tanktop and spandex, which it was too cold for anyway, she wore a red turtleneck and black jeans. The turtleneck said "HO HO HO!" across the front in black and there's a santa hat perched on her head. 

Ryou: *sweatdrop* Er... Get on with it... 

WSJ: Oh yeah! *puts star on top of the tree and gets down* This is a holiday fic, obviously. Me and three co-stars arrange a little holiday mayhem with the YGO gang. 

Bakura: How many times are you going to say 'holiday'? 

WSJ: Um... Many. I don't own YGO, and my three authoress friends own themselves. 

Warnings: Um... Pegasus-, Tea- and Tristan-bashing. *shrugs* Blame KaTyA for the Tea and Pegasus, ('cuz I like both of them *hugs Pegasus plushie*) and I can't _stand_ Tristan. 

Pairings? *sweatdrop* Probably just about every strait couple possible. (Sorry, I absolutly refuse to write yaoi.) I'm gonna add a lot of Malik/Tea and Mai/Seto hints, just because those are my favorite couples. There'll probably be a good bit of Seto/Isis, Mai/Joey and Katya/Yugi too, just so Katya'll let me keep my head. *sweatdrops again* 

()()()()() 

"'SJ! 'SJ wait up!" 

Wingleader Sora Jade, aka 'SJ or WSJ, turned with a bit of difficulty in the crowded hallways of Domino High to wait for her friend. The slightly-shorter girl finally caught up with her and the two headed for the exit. 

"No more school until January!" WSJ said excitedly, wrapping a blue and gold scarf around her neck as she did. "What holiday plans ya' got Win?" 

Baby Winter (aka Li) gave her an annoyed look while pulling on her gloves. "Don't call me Win! And no, no plans so far." She shrugged. "Grandma's sick, so we won't be going to her house like we usually do." 

WSJ blinked as the two friends stepped outside. (O.o) "Weirdness! So's my Gramma! Our plans got trashed... Wanna do somethin' together?" 

"Like what?" 

Both girls turned toward the new voice, wide grins splitting their faces. "Hey Katya!" they chorused. 

"We both just realised we have absolutly nothing to do over Christmas break..." Li said. 

Katya grinned. "Ooooo! I got it! We need to cause a little chaos with Yugi and co!" 

The other two nodded excitedly. "And I know just who should help!" WSJ said. "Hey, Hotaru!" 

A raven-haired girl with blond bangs walking past them turned and walked over, her backpack slung over one shoulder. "Hi WSJ, Li, Katya. Wha'sup?" 

"We just wanted to do something 'fun' for Christmas." Li said. "Any ideas?" 

Hotaru thought for a moment, and then her eyes lit up. "I've got it!" 

The pendant around WSJ's neck began to glow. It was a ring with four sharp points around the edge, much like the Millenium Ring itself, except it was silver instead of gold, but had no pyramid inside. It was called the Millenium Pendant, and WSJ had stolen it from Joey after the end of _A Yami of my Own_ and evictted Jakan. 

Anyway, it began to glow, and Yami-WSJ arrived from her soulroom. Yami-WSJ was slightly shorter then her hikari, and her hair was much shorter too. She wore a black turtle-neck and a dark-green leather coat with black jeans. Her eyes, instead of WSJ's blue-grey, were bright green. "Share! For the love of little green apples _share_! I wanna get Bakura good..." She giggled evilly. 

WSJ sweatdropped at her yami. "I thought you and Bakura were going out." 

"Yeah, we are, but that doesn't stop me from torturing him endlessly!" The ancient-Egyptian temptress giggled again, sounding rather disturbingly like Weevil. 

Sencing that her friend and partner-in-crime had desided to show up, Yami-Li came out as well. Li's Millenium Item was an armband that she wore around her upper-left arm, and at the moment was hidden beneath her shirt sleeve. 

Yami-Li was about the same height as her other, and had long black hair with silver streaks pulled back into a low ponytail with a navy ribbon. She had on a red sweater and black jeans, as well as a rather silly-looking red-and-green jester's hat. She and Yami-WSJ greeted each other, and then turned expectantly to Hotaru. "Well?" 

The four teens and two yamis gathered in a circle, their heads together, oblivious to the snowstorm brewing to the north... 

~*~ 

"So, just _why_ are we here again?" 

Yugi glanced over at his other. "Yami, be nice. The girls invited us over for Christmas Eve. Granpa's up at some of his friends' house, so we'd be alone anyway. We should be happy." 

Yami groaned. "Right. And your Granpa seems to have forgotten that you're supposed to be with family for Christmas... What's in the bag, presents?" 

Yugi sweatdropped and tried to hide the bulging dufflebag behind his rather-too-small back. "Maybe?" He reached up and pressed the doorbell to forstall any further complaints or comments. 

The door was opened almost immediatly by Li, who saw it was them and glanced nervously over her shoulder. "Ok guys," she said a moment later. "Katya's in the kitchen. You should be safe. Here, I'll show you where the den is." 

The party/dinner was being held in WSJ's house, seeing as it was the biggest and her parents were away for the weekend, desiding suddenly to go see their sick Gramma. 

"You look rather, er, festive today Li..." Yugi said. 

Li grinned, twirling around slightly. "Ya' like it?" She was dressed in a green ribbed, sleeve-less tanktop, black jean shorts and black boots. She'd either stolen the jester's hat from her yami or gotten another one, because she was wearing it. She also had her ever-present leather backpack on, and her Armband was clearly visible now. 

"Aren't you a little cold though?" Yami asked pointedly. 

Li blinked. "Not really. Authoress powers, ya' know?" 

Li ushered them into the den where most everyone else was already mingling. Malik and Bakura were fighting over the last finger sandwich (although Bakura, being a yami, technically didn't eat). Ryou was standing nearby and sweatdropping. Mokuba and Joey were discussing something or other, probably Mokuba's onii-san from the way they kept gesturing toward him. Said onii-san was in the corner, gritting his teeth and trying to keep from strangling Pegasus, who was a little ways away talking with Tristan. Apparently, Yami-Li, WSJ, Yami-WSJ, Hotaru, Katya, Tea, Mai and Isis were in the kitchen or dining room, setting up for the feast. Yami-Malik was no where in sight. 

"Mingle. Have some punch. It isn't spiked... yet..." Li said, pushing them into the room before turning back to the kitchen. 

Yami and Yugi looked at each other and shuddered. Maybe this wasn't such a good idea... With Yami-WSJ, Hotaru _and_ Bakura around things could get very ugly very fast... 

It was about ten minutes later when the girls came in to announce that dinner was ready. Everyone entered the moderately-sized dining room and managed to find seats. The yamis, although they didn't have to eat to survive like humans did, were _able_ to eat, and so desided to join them. WSJ offered a quick prayer (she insisted, stating that even if her other was a polytheist she herself was still a Christian) and then everyone dug in. 

It was a minute or so later when Isis spoke up. "Has anyone seen Yami-Malik?" 

Everyone blinked and shook their heads 'no', causing Malik to sweatdrop. "Great, he's not in his soul room, I know that." 

Everyone was suddenly startled out of their seats when loud, and I mean _loud_ rock music began to blast through the house. Pegasus, Tristan and Mokuba actually fell out of their chairs, and everyone else just stood there staring at each other open mouthed and covering their ears. 

"It seems Yami-Malik has discovered the wonders of the home entertainment system!" Katya yelled over the noise. 

"What the heck?!?!?!?" WSJ yelled back. "I don't even listen to rock!" 

Bakura, Yami, Seto and Malik, having had quite enough of the rock'n'roll, headed for the livingroom, where it seemed to be coming from. They stood in the door with their mouths open for the second time that day as they caught sight of what was inside. 

Yami-Malik stood on the couch, head-banging and air-guitaring along to the music. He was dressed in a pair of tight leather pants that didn't seem to fit quite right, tall black boots with high-heels that looked rather too small for him and a sky blue tank top. 

"Oh my gosh!" WSJ yelled, coming up behind them. "My cl- I mean, my _sister's_ clothes!" 

Bakura laughed. "Sure 'SJ, if you say so!" The loud music was beginning to get to him. In a good way. He threw his head back and joined Yami-Malik in screeching out the lyrics at the top of his voice. 

"You're getting closer, you're holding the rope and I'm takin' the fall! 'Cause I'm a loser!" 

The both of them began head-banging it like crazy, Bakura's long white hair being perfect for it. Yami-Malik's was a little less-perfect, being held rigidly in place with about twenty three bottles of hair gel. 

To the surprise of everyone who had gathered in the door to watch, Yugi, WSJ and Katya let out simultanious whoops and jumped in with them. Katya grabbed a place on the couch with Yami-Malik, Yugi jumped up on an over-stuffed arm chair and WSJ took to the coffee table, pulling Bakura up with her. 

"You're getting closer, to pushing me off of life's little edge! 'Cause I'm a loser, and sooner or later you know I'll be dead!" 

Yugi launched into a mock guitar solo as an instrumental part of the song came on. The other four continued to head-bang and dance around to the blaring music. 

Hotaru became aware of the steady click of a camera and glanced up to see a grinning Mai holding WSJ's parents' camera. She shrugged and ignored it, figuring if anything the pictures would be good blackmail to use on WSJ and Katya. 

The song came to an end and the five "rock-stars" collapsed onto whatever they were perched on, in WSJ's case she landed smack in Bakura's lap, who blushed faintly before pushing her off. They sat breathless for a moment, those looking on stunned into silence. 

Finally, Yami was the one who broke it. "Yugi, since when do you know all the lyrics to "Loser"?" 

Yugi flushed and was about to answer when the front door opened to admit two people, covered in snow. Both were considerably shorter then most of the people there, excluding Mokuba and Yugi of course, and appeared a good deal younger too. 

WSJ's face flushed in anger and she jumped up from her resting place on the floor. "Canine, Feline, what do you two want? I thought you were going to stay at Ivy's tonight." 

"Well, yeah, we were," said Feline Fairy, WSJ's nine-year-old sister as she stripped off her soggy coat and boots. "But she sent us home because it's snowing so bad." 

CanineShadowFox, WSJ's seven-year-old brother, nodded in agreement. The two of them looked around and finally seemed to notice all the teenagers (and Pegasus) in the room with them. "Er..." 

Feline's eyes went starry and all the bishonen in the room involentarily cringed back in fear. "Yugi-kun!" she yelled, making for the tri-color-haired shrimp. She was about half-way there when Katya grabbed her by the collar of her sweater. 

"Oh no you don't! Not _my_ Yugi!" 

The rest of the room sweatdropped and Seto looked around for anything to distract the two feuding fangirls. He glanced out the window and did a double take. "For the love of little green apples, look at the snow!" 

It was coming down hard and fast, and was beginning to pile up into mini-snow drifts already. It looked like it had been coming down for awhile and that it wouldn't let up for a long time. 

WSJ sighed. "Maybe you guys had all better go home. It looks like it's going to get bad out there soon." 

Everyone agreed and began to gather hats and coats and anything else they needed. 

"I'm dreamin' of a white Christmas!" Isis crooned as she rooted around under the couch for her other boot. 

"Joey, are you humming Jingle Bell Rock?" Mai asked. 

Said blond blinked. "Yes. Er, no?" 

"Jingle Bells, Kaiba smells, he ought to lay an egg!" 

"STUFF IT!" Mokuba, Seto and Katya yelled at once. Pegasus shrunk back from them. "Jeez, don't blow a gasket..." 

Safely to say, it was another twenty minutes before anyone was ready to leave. Hotaru headed for the door, and opened it. Or tried to open it. "WSJ, are you sure this thing opens outwards?" 

"Yeah, I should, it's my house. Why?" 

Malik, who had been standing nearby, paled slightly. "Gimme that!" He took the doorknob out of Hotaru's hand and turned it, throwing his shoulder against the door at the same time. It didn't move. 

By now everyone was getting a little panicy, and Seto and Yami quickly joined in helping try to open the door. Even with their combined efforts it only moved a couple of inches. Snow fell through the crack. 

Yami-WSJ sighed and took the door from Seto's unrisisting hand, gently pulling it closed again. She then turned to face the assembled teenagers and miscellanious yamis. 

"Well ladies and gents, I think we're stuck." 

()()()()() 

That's all for chapter one! I hope y'all liked it. *sweatdrop* Sorry if it's un-funny, but it will get better, I promise. This chapter was just setting the stage. 

Yeah, I know 3 Doors Down (the band that sings "Loser") isn't technically rock, but who cares. ^_^ 3 Doors Down rule! And yes, my comment about not listening to rock is correct. Mostly I listen to country. (Go Rascal Flatts!) 3DD is about the only non-country band I listen too. 

God bless minna-san! 


	2. Holly and Home Videos

WSJ: *giggles* At the moment I am in the middle of writing chapter 9 of _Visions of the Heart_ (I'm writing them at the same time even though by the time I get around to posting this VotH will be long-over) and I'm getting really depressed... *sniffles* Poor Bakura... So I've desided to switch to a little humor for a few minutes to lighten my mood. ^_^ I also just finished reading DarkGatomon's hillarious fic, "As If!", chapter 12 for the five-hundredth time! (And I'm really glad I had the sence to save it to my hard-drive because FF.N desided it came under the heading of "bloopers" and took it down! *sniffles*) 

Ryou: *reads ahead, sweatdrop* Oh crap... 

WSJ: ^__^ Lovely, isn't it! I don't own YGO and my siblings/yami/authoress friends own themselves. 

()()()()() 

PCHANGE -- Chapter 2: Holly and Home Videos 

(Credit for the home videos idea goes to my lovely co-authoress Baby Winter, aka Li. *Li runs in wearing a red-and-green jester's cap and trips over the shag rug on WSJ's floor* 0.o;... Um...) 

In the silence that followed Yami-WSJ's statement, sounds of chewing could be heard. This was followed by sweatdrops all around, until finally Seto got annoyed. "Chikusho! What _is_ that?" 

Feline's jaw dropped, and WSJ groaned. "You baka!!! How dare you curse in front of her! Let alone Canine and Mokuba!" She slapped him over the head. Seto was just about to say something in return when a squeal rang through the house. 

"YAMI! Don't eat that!" 

There was a sudden mass stampede as everyone ran for the den, where the yell had come from. Seto, Yami-Malik, and Pegasus fell over in laughter, and Bakura grabbed the camera from Mai and began to busily snap pictures. Everyone else was straining to hold in giggles, but only Tea, Feline, and Katya looked down-right pessimistic. 

Yami was on his hands and knees on the floor, a long string of decrotive holly in his mouth. Yugi was tugging on the other end, trying to get him to let go. 

Even Joey was struggling to hold in giggles, and managed to snicker to Seto, "So, who's the dog _now_ Kaiba?" 

At this line Kaiba bursts out laughing, even more so then he was. Joey, Bakura, Yami-Malik, Hotaru, and WSJ joined him on the floor, laughing their heads off. 

"Dear sweet mother-of-pearl! This is too much!!!" Malik laughed, tears of mirth running down his face. He and Ryou were leaning against each other to keep from falling over. 

"Hey," Katya asked, puzzled. "Isn't holly supposed to be poisonous?" 

"Yes!" Yugi grunted, still trying to get the holly away from Yami, who was now growling at his aibou. "And a little help here would be nice!" 

Katya, Tea, and Feline, the resident Yami-fans/Yugi-fans, ran over to do the midget's bidding. Feline grabbed him around the waist, Katya grabbed her around the waist, and Tea grabbed Katya's shoulders. They began to tug along with Yugi, but unfortunatly the ex-pharoah was still a bit too strong. 

"Oh for Egypt's sakes! Just let him have it!" Isis said, looking rather bored. 

The three fangirls gave her annoyed looks. "We don't want Yami-sama to die!!!" Yugi just sweatdropped and nodded slightly. 

"Oh in the name of Ra! He's already dead!" Yami-Malik said, throwing his hands into the air. 

Yugi blinked again, realized he was right, and, desiding it wasn't worth pulling a muscle over, let go of the holly chain. Unfortunately, Yami was still tugging with all his might on the other end. Letting go so quickly sent Yugi tumbling backwards, right into Katya's lap. The two stared at each other for a moment, both of them faintly blushing, before they realized what they were doing and scrambled away from each other. 

And, of course, when Yugi had gone flying backwards, so did Yami. The poor Pharoah never knew what had hit him. One moment he was trying to get the yummy green suff away from his aibou, and the next he's smacking into a body. 

Mystery person: Omph! 

Yami rolls off of the person to see that it's a girl who he'd never seen before, standing, or rather, now sitting, in front of a large purple and blue hole in the wall that also hadn't been there previously. She sits up, rubbing her head, and looks around. "The heck?" 

WSJ sweatdrops and goes over to help her up. "Don't ask, please, just don't..." 

The rest of the cast blinked. "Um... Who are you and where have you come from?" Yami-Malik asked, obviously puzzled. 

Katya, WSJ, Hotaru, and Li stared at him like he was insane, glanced back at the purple-and-blue hole, and then back to him. They sweatdropped slightly and said in unison, "Plot Hole." 

The new girl grinned and nodded. "You bet! My name's Rosie-sama, I'm WSJ's best friend/aibou/partner-in-crime in real life." 

WSJ suddenly notices the large black bag slung over her friend's shoulder. "You got them?" 

Rosie nodded and grinned evilly. "You bet!" 

"Got what?" Seto asked, confused. 

Rosie glanced over at him, then did a double-take and froze. "Kaiba-sama!" She shook herself out of WSJ's grip and ran to the CEO, knocking him to the floor in a flying tackle. 

This set everyone (except, of course, Kaiba) off laughing again. Rosie was sitting contentedly on Seto's lap, hugging him around the neck. 

"Can't... Breathe!" Seto gasped, trying to pry the fangirl-ish teen off him. WSJ chuckled and pulled her best friend off of him. 

"You can't love him if he's dead!" 

Rosie's face fell and she nodded, before remembering the black bag she carried and grinned evilly. "This'll be fun...!" 

"Come on," WSJ led them into the livingroom and everyone found seats. Ryou, Bakura, and Malik collapsed onto the couch. Kaiba snagged the armchair and Mokuba climbed up on his lap. Li and Isis pulled in chairs from the kitchen, and everyone else took seats on the floor. Rosie and WSJ sat down on the mantle in front of the fireplace and turned around so that no one could see what they were doing. There was a lot of whispering and fervent giggling, and then WSJ jumped up to pop a tape into the VCR. 

The screen came on, and at first it was fuzzy. Then it came into focus, and showed a small, blond toddler, completely in the nude, dancing around and singing the Barney song. He only looked to be about three or four. 

The cast stared in awe at the screen for a moment, and then slowly turned to look at a certain blond. 

Seto grinned maliciously and snickered. "So, Joey, when were you planning to tell us about this?" 

Malik and his yami, on the other hand, were frantically clawing at their eyes. "I'm blind! I shall never see again!" Malik wailed. 

"Too many disturbing images!!!" Yami-Malik added. 

Mai was laughing hysterically. "Oh Joseph, you've done a lot of stupid things, but this takes the cake!" 

Joey blushed to the roots of his hair. "I was three! Give me a break!" He rounded on WSJ and Rosie, who were giggling. "How could you do this to me?!?" 

"Easily!" they chorused, grinning at him. 

"But," WSJ said, "You can choose who's embarrassing home video we show next." 

Joey's eyes lit up. "Anyone?" 

Rosie nodded. "Anyone in thsi room. I've got tapes of 'em all! Even Katya, Li, Hotaru, and you, WSJ." 

The authroesses gulped,a dn WSJ glared at her best friend. "Rosie! How could you!?!" 

"Noooo!" Hotaru moaned. "If we get out of this alive, I'm going to kill you Rosie!" 

"I'm going to kill Li for even suggesting it!" Katya said. 

Li sweatdropped slightly. "I think I'll just hide..." 

Rosie grinned, adding a bit of sadism to it. "Sorry, all the doors and windows of this room have automatically locked, and they won't open again until each and every video has been shown!" 

"Fine!" WSJ growled, her fingers twitching from the surpressed erge to strangle the snickering red-head. "Let's just get on with it then! Joey?" 

The blond contemplated, looking around the room with a thoughtful expression on his face. "I pick..." 

()()()()() 

WSJ: I need video suggestions! Anybody, including the yamis! (You'll see how that's possible a little later) Oh, and Li, Hotaru, Katya, I need you guys to e-mail me your most embarrassing moment for your tapes. ^_~ Don't put it in a review, because then other people can see it. Also, who should Joey pick? 

God bless minna-san! 


	3. White Reflection, DubBashing, and Kermit...

WSJ: I banged most of the rough draft for this out in algebra class yesterday, so if it has a certain confused quality about it, that's the reason. 

Ryou: Why haven't you updated in so long 'SJ? 

WSJ: *grins widely* Well, for one thing, writers' block. For the second, I got the Lord of the Rings speciel edition DVD a couple nights ago, and I stayed up half the night watching it. ^__^ I love LotR! I'm dying for Two Towers to come out!!!! *wiggles in her seat* The Riders of Rohan, Eowyn, Faramir, not to mention Gollum and Shelob!! *shivers in excitment* 

Bakura: *gives her a side-ways look* Right... We don't own YGO. 

WSJ:...But at the moment I have Yami-Malik-kun locked in my closet for my own amusement! ^_^ *a crash is heard from off-set* Uh... 

Ryou: *sweatdrops* Not anymore... *furvent swearing in Egyptian is heard* Better run onee-chan! 

WSJ: *nods* Great idea! *runs* 

()()()()() 

PCHANGE 

Chapter 3 -- White Reflection and Dub-bashing 

"I pick..." 

Everyone tenced for Joey's choice, hoping it wouldn't be them. Seto looked especially nervous, and rightly so. 

"I pick... Mai!" Joey said, grinning at her. Seto let out a long sigh of relief and slumped back in the arm-chair. Mai, however, was not so enthusiastic. 

"JOEY!!!!!!!!" Quickly Isis and Tea, who were sitting nearest Mai, grabbed her arms to keep her from leaping enraged on Joey Wheeler. "Omae wo korosu!" 

Rosie and WSJ grinned, and WSJ broke into spontaneous song. "I feel your love reflection, The truth of our acceptance of each other! Kiss me --- and there's nothing else that I'll need!" (And she sang rather badly, at that) 

The rest of the cast clamped their hands over their ears, and Yami sent a glare at the blond authoress, a peice of holly still hanging out of his mouth. "What in the name of Brood Mayran are you singing?!?" 

"White Reflection!" WSJ said, grinning. 

"O-kaaaay..." Yugi said slowly. "And just _why_ are you singing White Reflection?" 

WSJ paused for an instant, and then belted out the next bit of chorus before answering him. "I feel your love reflection, Believe in the passion that will not give up! Our piercing through the eternal battle, Never ending story… Well, ya' see Yugi-chan, Mai just used Heero Yuy's catch-phrase." she shrugged, now a little unsure of herself. "I love White Reflection, which is, after all, a Gundam Wing song, and that just reminded me of it." 

"You're lucky she wasn't singing May It Be..." Rosie muttered. 

"What?" Mokuba asked. "Why?" 

"Because I just got the special edition DVD! I've been watching it non-stop!" WSJ squealed. 

Bakura frowned slightly, pointing up at the introduction. "Yes, so you said..." 

"_Any_way," Hotaru interrupted, "Let's put Mai's video in." 

"Yes, let's," Rosie said, pulling it out of her bag. "And it's got a title too. _Where Mai Was During DDM_." 

"DDM?" asked Bakura and Ryou in unison. 

"Dungeon Dice Monsters," Yugi supplied, taking a side-ways look at Mai. "This should be good. I always wondered where you were during all that." 

Mai suddenly realised what it was the tape contained, and her eyes widened. "No! There's no way anyone could have taped that!" 

"Yes there is," Rosie said, holding up a palm-sized digital video camera. "When I came here I had just finished up travelling through time and space, taping everyone's most embarrassing moments." She grinned, winked, and blew a kiss at the yamis, who, until now, had thought they were safe. All five of them paled noticably. 

"Oh by Ra, no..." 

And it doesn't really matter who said that. 

WSJ looked at her best friend curiosly. "You travelled through Time? Wouldn't Susan be ticked?" 

Rosie's face flushed red and she whacked the other authoress on the back of the head. "You idiot! I said I travelled through time, not Time! Get your mind out of the gutter!" 

WSJ pouted. "Aibou, you're no fun..." 

(WSJ's Note: Susan Sto Helit and Time, aka Lobsang Ludd belong to the almighty Terry Pratchett. I just wanted to use them. *giggles* If you go read chapter 2 of ASN, Lobsang shows up there too. I dunno why I'm so obsessed with them tonight...) 

Suddenly Mai let out a blood-curtling scream and tried to lunge at the TV to throw it out a window as the picture snapped into focus. This time it took the combined efforts of Isis, Yami-WSJ, and Yami-Li to hold her down. Tea ended up getting kicked in the jaw with Mai's high-heels and fell over, completely knocked out. 

There would have been a celebration, but at the moment everyone was too busy staring at the TV screen and trying to hold in their lunch, many of them looking blue across the nose. 

On the video Mai was dressed in a skimpy cheerleader's outfit, with a pom-pom in each hand. She was in her livingroom, jumping up and down and waving the pom-poms. The TV in front of her was on, and showed the DDM duel between Yami and *shudders slightly* Duke. She was also screaming at the top of her lungs, along with the three cheerleaders on the screen. 

"Duke, Duke, he's my man! If he can't do it, no one can!" 

Back in WSJ's livingroom, Yami looked hurt. "You weren't rooting for me?" 

To her credit, Mai had the courtesy to look embarrassed. "Well... You... I mean... Er..." Finally she burst out, "You _beat_ me in the Duelist Kingdom semi-finals! _Me_!" 

Yami cringed. "Still sore about that? Look, it's not _my_ fault I'm King of Games...!" He looked around frantically for anything to distract Mai, but found something to distract himself instead. "Hey look! Pine cones!" 

"No Yami!" Yugi yelled as his other ran for the basket of pine cones on the coffee table. "You're not supposed to eat those either!" 

"Eh, let 'im," Tristan said, shrugging. "The holly didn't kill 'im, so chances are pine cones won't either." 

"And besides..." Mai continued like she hadn't been interrupted. "Duke's really, well..." she shrugged. "Hot." 

"Yeah..." Isis sighed. 

"Hell yeah!" Yami-WSJ pitched in. 

"Isis?!?" Malik and Yami-Malik sputtered, oogling at the older girl. 

"Anjil!?!?!?!" Bakura looked hurt. (WSJ: Anjil is my yami's name. I just usually call her Yami-WSJ to make it easier) 

"Mai!!!" Joey looked absolutly murderous. "Let me at that Devlin guy! I'll skin 'im! I'll tear 'im apart!" 

The five authoresses looked mildly disgusted. "I'd _love_ to let you do that Joey, but I don't think the Duke-fans would like that very much..." Li sighed. 

Katya blinked and turned to her friend. "There are Duke-fans?" 

"Weeeell..." Li paused. "Otogi-fans, yeah. Duke-fans? I dunno, probably not." 

The five of them sweatdropped slightly and said in unison, "Stupid dubbers..." 

WSJ shuddered. "Terrance..." 

They shivered, and Malik gagged. "How _awful_!" 

"Who in their right mind would name their kid Terrance? And an Egyptian kid, no less! That is _so_ messed up..." WSJ said. 

Rosie shuddered and agreed. "Okay Mai, whose video's next?" 

Mai shot a look at a certain CEO, who was trying to hide a grin at her earlier discomfort. "Seto Kaiba." 

Kaiba started and looked like he'd choked on his tongue. This was quickly followed by a glare in Mai's direction. "You-" 

"We know," Pegasus and Yugi interrupted in tandem. "You monster..." 

Kaiba blinked. "Er... Yeah," 

WSJ grinned at him and fished around in Rosie's bag, easily pulling out the tape she sought. She stuck it into the VCR and pressed the play button. Everyone settled back into their seats. Well, Kaiba was forced to, since he suddenly had both Rosie and Mokuba warring for space on his lap. 

The screen came on, and the entire group burst out laughing. Seto looked about six or seven, and was modelling a green Halloween costume for whoever held the camera. The person, everyone assumed it was Gozenboru (is that how you spell his name...?), laughed and said "Okay Seto, turn around now, show me the back," To the surprise of all, it was a woman's voice. 

Kaiba blushed and ducked his head a little. "That was right before mom died... If she hadn't been so sick I wouldn't have worn that stupid thing. But he was her favorite, so..." 

Joey snorted back a laugh. "That's real noble of ya' and all, Kaiba, really. But, come on! _Kermit the Frog?!_" 

Kaiba's face reddened further, this time in anger, and he looked like he was ready to pounce on the unsuspecting blond duelist. "Look inu, it wasn't my choice!" Suddenly he seemed to remember something, and his face brightened up. "Keep it rolling 'SJ!" 

She did, and within seconds the cast was on the floor in laughter again. Mokuba, only about three, had just waddled into the line of the camera, dressed up in a rediculously large Miss Piggy costume. 

"Awwww!" Feline said, running over to give the blushing boy a hug. "It's okay Moku-chan!" 

"Hey," Mokuba said suddenly, attempting to break out of her grip. "Do you hear a rumbling sound?" 

Indeed, now that everyone stopped to listen, they could. It got closer until something crashed through the roof and landed smack on Malik's lap. It coughed slightly, and then looked up, reveiling the face of a girl about WSJ's age. 

"Oh, hullo." 

()()()()() 

WSJ: *high-fives ShadowWolf* Welcome to the party Wolfie! We're gonna have an awesome time! *giggles* 

Chapter 4: Videos abandonned for now, the group turns to pleasenter things. Bakura, Yami-WSJ, and Yami-SW get into a heated argument about Ancient Egypt and babies, which turns into an all-out *w*itch fight between Yami-WSJ and Yami-Wolf. Meanwhile, Yami-Malik, Hotaru, and Katya deside to sacrifice Tea and Pegasus to call forth the Black Luster Soldier! But instead they get... Chibi-Malik!? 

God bless minna-san! 


	4. Brawls, Sacrifices, and ChibiMalik

WSJ: . . . Scarry thing is, our yamis are really like this, aren't they SW? *shudders* They absolutly can't stand each other, you'll see why in a minute. . . I don't own YGO and various authoresses/siblings own themselves. 

Anyway, I'm switching this to script format, because it's soooooo much easier to write in. ^^ Sorry. 

()()()()() 

As soon as she saw who it was that had landed on Malik's lap, WSJ groaned, Li grinned, and Yami-WSJ hissed and narrowed her eyes. 

WSJ: *slightly nervously* Hi ShadowWolf. You didn't by any chance leave the Millenium Crystal at home? 

ShadowWolf: *gets up and dusts herself off* Nope, sorry. But you're lucky that yami's asleep at the moment. 

Li: *high-fives SW* Duct tape is evil! *Yami-Li grins at the private joke* 

Seto: *looks around* Er... How'd you get here? And hey, where'd Tristan and Isis go? 

ShadowWolf: ?^^? Oh! Well, see, I was trying to hack away at my writer's block, and I guess I was too close when the explosives went off. And there's supposedly this law of physics that says that matter can only be exchanged. So my guess is that when I was blown here, Isis and Tristan were sent back to my realm to take my place. 

Yugi: But if you're the only one that came, then why did two people leave? It's not like your yami counts anything for your mass. 

From over beside the fire-place, a groan was heard, followed by furvent swearing in a familiar, arrogant voice. The figure pulled itself out of the flew, covered in soot, but still recognisable. He looked around the room and sweatdropped. 

Otogi: The hell? 

Mai: *squeals* Otogi! *glomp* 

Otogi: Omph! Let go of me, onna! 

Mai: *blinks up at him* What? 

Chibi-Wufei (Gundam W): *pops out of no where* *high, squeaky, very un-Wufei-like voice* Onna! It means woman, you blasted onna! *pops back to wherever he came from* 

WSJ exchanges a quick glance with Rosie. 

WSJ: That wasn't... 

Rosie: *nods slightly* It was... 

ShadowWolf: *suddenly begins to look nervous* 'SJ? Yami's waking up... She wants out... 

WSJ: *groans* Here we go again... I suggest everybody find some place to hide... 

Kaiba: *crosses his arms* What for? 

Before anyone can answer, Yami-SW steps out of her hikari's frame, yawning and looking around. She spies Yami-WSJ, who instantly bristles, and Yami-SW does the same. Seeing the looks on their faces, everyone begins to back away. Bakura sighs and hangs his head. 

Yami-SW: What're you doing here bi***? 

Yami-WSJ: Same thing you are, my hikari's here. But at least _I_ was invited, you whore! 

Yami-SW: *growls* Who're you callin' a whore?! 

Bakura: *steps in between them* Ladies, please, I love you both! It's just that you, *points at Yami-SW* are my sister, and you *points at Yami-WSJ* are my wife! 

Yami-WSJ: *looks smug* Told ya'! _And_ we had a daughter, might I add! 

Yami-SW: *shocked* Wh-what?! YOU HAD A KID AND NEVER TOLD ME?!! 

Yami-WSJ: You were dead by that time! And besides, it's not like we actually ended up raising her... Bakura left her at the palace. 

At this, Yami's and Yami-Li's jaws drop, Yugi and Ryou wince, and Bakura slaps himself on the forehead. 

Bakura: *through gritted teeth* Great, thanks a lot Anjil... 

Yami: *in major shock* M-My daughter, the one I adopted, w-was... was... YOURS!?!?! 

Yami-Li: *muttering angrily to herself* In my past life I was queen... 

Before anybody can do anything, Yami's eyes roll back in his head, and his flops backwards into Yami-Malik's arms. Yami-Malik catches him out of instinct, sees who it is, and drops him. Yami hits the floor with a thud. 

Otogi: Oh, great job Ishtar... *still trying to pry Mai off of him* 

Yami-Li: *screeches* You made Yami-koi faint! 

Yami-SW: You'd better not mean me! I'M not the one who had a kid with Bakura and left her at the palace! 

Yami-WSJ: EWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'd hope not! Insest! 

Yami-SW: *face turns purple in rage* Why you- Are you suggesting?! 

Yami-WSJ: *glares: Mey-bey. If the shoe fits... 

Yami-SW: THAT'S IT!!!!!!!!!!! *leaps on Yami-WSJ* 

Yami-WSJ and Yami-SW go down screeching. The room quickly empties of occupants, except for the two feuding yamis, unconcious Yami-Yugi, Yami-Li, who is tending him, Bakura, who feels somewhat responcible for this, and their five hikaris. 

SW: *sweatdrops* Great, here we go again... 

WSJ: *puts her head in her hands* Oh for the love of little green apples... 

Yami-WSJ: *steps on unconcious Yami* 

Yami-Li: HEY! Watch it! *leaps into the brawl* 

Li, WSJ & SW: -.-;; 

Bakura, Ryou & Yugi: -_-;; 

~~Meanwhile!!~~ 

Hotaru: *singing sencelessly to herself* 

Katya: What're you singing Hotaru-chan? 

Hotaru: *shrugs* I dunno... 

Katya: *sighs* I'm bored... 

Hotaru: *gets an evil grin on her face* I gotta idea... *whistles* Hey Ishtar! 

Yami-Malik: *trots over* What? And make it quick, Kaiba and Joey are taping the brawl for blackmailing later. 

Hotaru: *grins* *whispers something to him and Katya* 

Katya: *claps her hands* Oh goodie! I know just who! *runs off to find Pegasus and Tea* 

Ten minutes later Ishtar, Katya and Hotaru are stadnign in WSJ's bedroom, where Tea and Pegasus are now tied up and gagged. 

Katya: Okay, if we're going to call forth the Black Luster Soldier, how're we gonna sacrifice them? 

Ishtar: *lightbulb lights up over his head* I know! Let's drop them out the window! *sees lightbulb* Ooooooo!!!!!!!!!!! Perty.... *begins to chew on it* 

Katya: *claps hands* Great idea Ishtar! 

Hotaru: *scratches her head* But, I thought WSJ's house was only one story... 

Katya: *shrugs* 'Nother plot hole. *begins to lug Pegasus toward the window. Hotaru follows suit with Tea* 

BBBBBBBZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

The authoresses look over at Ishtar, who has managed to electrocute himself from chewing on the lightbulb. The sigh, sweatdrop, and then continue to lug the sacrifices toward the window. 

Pegasus: *managed to chew through the gag* Can't we talk about this? 

Hotaru & Katya: No! *push him out the window, Tea not far behind* 

_Ploop..._

Hotaru: *confused* Ploop? 

Katya: I think it's some joke of Rosie and WSJ's. Something about Monty Python... 

Hotaru: *shrugs* If you say so... 

Katya: *pause* How long do we have to wait? 

Hotaru: How'm I supposed to know? 

Chibi-Malik: *bounces up through the window* I *w*itchs! 

Hotaru & Katya: *sweatdrop* 

Chibi-Malik: *stands very still for a moment, listening to the noise from the brawl dowstairs* Mommy! *runs out of the room* 

Hotaru & Katya: *in unison* Mommy? *follow him* 

Hotaru and Katya enter the livingroom to see the brawl still going on, and Chibi-Malik clinging to Li's legs, rubbing his face against them like a cat. 

Hotaru: *stares at Li* You're his mommy? 

Li: *sweatdrops* What? No! Chibi-Malik's my muse! He was a present from WSJ over here, for guessing that Ryou's a telepath. 

Ryou: *blinks* I'm a telepath? 

Bakura: Tele-whatsis? 

WSJ: Telepath. A psycic. Not in this story Ry-chan. In the _Unseeing Hearts Trilogy_. _Visions of the Heart_ and its sequels. 

Ryou: Oh, *shudders* **that** story... 

Li: *trying to pry Chibi-Malik off of her* Will one of you take him? We really need to stop this brawl before- 

Malik: *runs in with a flamethrower straped to his back* BANZAI!!!!!! *jumps into the brawl, which quickly becomes, er, hotter* 

Li: -_-;;;; Too late... 

Hotaru: *chuckles* I'm so glad I don't have a yami... I'll take 'im Li. We'll go make Christmas cookies. 

Chibi-Malik: Yay! 

Yugi: I'll come too. Ryou? Wanna help? I think you're the only one in this house who can actually cook. 

Ryou: *chuckles* Sure. 

Hotaru: Hey! I can cook! Sorta... *sweatdrops* 

()()()()() 

Note/advertisments...: If you're a Gundam Wing fan, please check out my story _Cross of Gold_, especially if you've heard the song of the same name by Micheal W. Smith. I worked hard on it, and I really love the way it turned out. I'd appreciate all the reviews I can get! (And fangirls, it's Quatre-centered!) 

Chapter 5: Hotaru, Chibi-Malik, Yugi, and Ryou make cookies! Bakura joins them and... makes little butcher-knife-shaped ones? Ooooookaaaaayyy.... Hotaru desides to, er, spice them up a bit... Namely with a bottle of Ex-Lax in the batter... Will anyone be spared? And since only one bathroom in WSJ's house in functional, will anyone even survive? 

God bless minna-san! 


	5. Ex Lax and Ranma One Half

Okay, a lot of people reviewed last chapter and said they were confused. Sorry! So here's a list of the authoresses, their yamis, and any "connections" the yamis may have. ^_~ 

WSJ & Yami-WSJ -- Yami-WSJ aka "Anjil" is/was Bakura's wife. They had a daughter, whom they left at the palace for Pharoah Yami to raise, although he didn't know until now whose kid it was. (For a lot more on their past, see my _Unseeing Hearts Trilogy_, especially _All Saints' Night_. Bakura has a spiffy flash-back all about Anjil.) 

Baby Winter aka "Li" & Yami-Li -- Depending on which of Li's stories you read, her yami is either a suicidal run-away slave or the queen of Egypt. For my story I'm going with the latter, and assuming that meant she was married to Yami. That would also mean she was adoptive "mother" to Bakura and Yami-WSJ's daughter. 

ShadowWolf & Yami-SW -- Okay, _here's_ where it gets confusing... -.-;; Basicly, Yami-SW is Bakura's very protective older sister. She never liked Yami-WSJ, and got really mad when she found out that they got married without her concent. Long sory short, Yami-SW soon died, right before Yami-WSJ found out she was pregnant. So Yami-SW never knew she was an aunt, and that's why she blew a huge gasket last chapter. Yami-SW and Yami-WSJ simply continued their fued in this life, even though their hikaris are great friends. 

Hotaru -- No yami (thank Ra!) unless you count Mistress 9. I dunno if she'll be showing up in this fic, but mey-bey! 

KaTyA -- Also no yami, but she makes enough trouble for one... (Katya: ^^;; Hey!) 

And I'm super-sorry about the long delay! I've been working really hard on this absolutly _huge_ one-shot song-fic called _The Child Who Suffers_, using the song of the same name by Shania Twain. *shudders* It's already 44KB, the _longest_ I've ever written in a single-chaptered story, and it's not even half-way done yet!!! Expect updates on this and SoS to get farther apart until I can get that monster posted. 

Anyway, I've been over-dosing on Ranma 1/2 latly, and it has quite a few mentions in this chapter. I'm obsessed with Ryoga, just so's I warn you. *chuckles* Brood can testify to that... 

()()()()() 

PCHANGE -- Chapter 5: Ex-Lax and Ranma One-Half 

(Yes, I'm back to regular format. First of all because somebody complained, and second because I was writing this during choir class today and totally forgot to have it in script. *blinks innocently* Oh yes, and this is _all_ Ying-Yang's fault!!! (To find out more about Ying-Yang and my other "new" muses, check out my bio)) 

Hotaru, Yugi, and Ryou trooped into the kitchen, Chibi-Malik clinging to Ryou. It seemed that sometime in the past few minutes he had aquired a fetish for long, white hair. (WSJ: *waves innocently at Brood and holds up Yunet* {Everyone else, just ignore that! Private joke...}) Ryou had the hyper chibi in his arms as Chibi-Malik yanked away to his heart's content. Unfortunatly for our long-haired bishie, he was too much of a sweetie to pull Chibi-Malik off. 

"Don't destroy the kitchen," WSJ said, poking her head in from the livingroom, where the brawl still raged behind her. "Onegai?" 

Before any of the three could say anything, there was a terrific crash, followed by furvent swearing in Egyptian, English, _and_ Japanese. There was the unmistakable 'fwoosh' of a flamethrower, and WSJ's eyes narrowed in anger. "Oh shimatte! If they burn down the house I'll kill them all! Even the ones who're already dead!" The authoress gave a chipper little wave to the group in the kitchen and disappeared from view back into the livingroom, pulling a mallet out of HammerSpace as she did. 

Hotaru and the two hikaris looked at each other and sweatdropped as the sound of insane laughter and multiple whackings were heard. 

"Don't make me Shi Shi Hokodan you!" That was unmistakably the voice of WSJ. 

"Hey, since when are _you_ Ryoga Hibiki?" That sounded like Yami-WSJ. "And besides, don't you have to be depressed to use Shi Shi Hokodan?" 

"Believe you me, if you wreck this house I _will_ be depressed. Hey! Malik! Put the flamethrower awa- Iiiiieeeeeeeee!!!!!!!!!!!!! Fine! That's it! Bakusai Tenket!!!!!" (WSJ: I don't think that was quite right... Was it Ranma-fans? I'm new to this anime...) 

There was a brief surge of power, a breifer surge of flame, and then, to the surprise of all, a metallic-sounding clang. Hotaru risked a glance around the door frame and immediatly wished she hadn't. 

WSJ was standing beside a pile of unconcious bodies, including Yamis-Li, WSJ & SW, Malik, and Seto and Joey, who had apparently been caught in WSJ's Bakusai Tenket, the smoking camcorder beside them. Li, Bakura, and SW were standing in the corner, wide-eyed. Li was clutching Yami-Yugi (still unconcious) tightly against her. Everyone else was crowding around the door, eyes equally wide. 

WSJ had apparently split a dimentional rift again, like she often did when she was angry, this time apparently into the Ranmaverse. Ryoga's green battle-aura had sprung up around her, and his trademarked yellow and black bandana was around her neck. Ukyou's giant battle-spatula was in one hand, and Akane's mallet was in the other. She was dressed in a combination of Ranma-chan's and Shampoo's clothes. She was breathing heavily, and her hair was fluffed up in a way that almost made her look like Kuno. 

The authoress took a deep breath, and the green aura faded from around her. Everyone in the room who had been quietly holding their breath (which was everyone in the room) slowly let it out in releif. At least she hadn't tried for the Shi Shi Hokodan. 

Hotaru was about to turn back to the kitchen when Bakura made himself noticible in front of her. "Erm, I think I'll come with you... It seems safer..." Hotaru noticed that he was fingering the ends of his hair, which were slightly singed from where he'd almost been hit with WSJ's Ryoga-esque blast. She resisted the erge to giggle. 

A yell from WSJ caused her to panic, pull Bakura inside, and then close and lock the door. "Oh dear," 

"What?" Yugi asked, looking up from where he'd calmly been organising the ingredients. 

Hotaru winced as the yell was echoed again, louder and more love-struck. 

"P-CHAN!!!!!!!!!!!!" 

"Does that answer your question? He must have slipped through the rift along with Akane's mallet, Ukyou's spatula and Ranma and Shampoo's clothes. Man, I feel sorry for him..." 

The YGO bishies, who had no idea what she was talking about, desided to ignore her. The two bishies, one authoress, one yami and single chibi worked on in silence, gathering ingredients and starting to follow the recepie, until Ryou began to hum, then sing. 

"On the first day of Christmas, my lover gave to me-" 

He was cut off by Yugi. "Lover? I always thought it was 'true love'?" 

Ryou looked puzzled. "Oh... Well, the way Bakura always sang it-" 

Bakura tried to be looking veeery closely at the chocoa he was pulling out of the cupboard suddenly. 

"Newer min' dat!" Chibi-Malik piped in his lisped chibi-talk. "I gots one dat Li teached me!" He cleared his throat, and then began a very loud, warbling version, _his_ version, of "God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen". 

"Da' baffroom door said 'genddlemen', so I jus' walked right in!" 

Yugi colored slightly and slapped his hand over CM's mouth, while Ryou paled. "Heard it," they both squeaked. Hotaru and Bakura gave them weird looks, which they chose to ignore. (Full version of that song (minus the lisp) will be at the bottom people! Rosie's the one who taught it to me, so I have her to thank.) 

Hotaru grinned slightly, thankful that for the moment the others were occupied with CM. It gave her the perfect oppertunity to pull a small bottle out of her pocket and pour a little of the contents into the batter. 

"Hotaru!" 

Hotaru jumped at the harsh whisper and turned to face Bakura, who was looking at her sternly. "Eh heh, B-Bakura!" 

He grinned at her sadisticly. "If you're going to Ex-Lax the batter," he said dangerously, checking over his shoulder to make sure neither Yugi nor Ryou could hear. "You do it like _this_." With that the yami grabbed the bottle and up-ended the whole thing into the batter, much to Hotaru's shock. "Now," he said viciously, grinning to desplay his fangs. "All we have to do is avoid the cookies." 

Outside, the two women looking in the window gave each other long looks. "Should we warn them?" 

"Nah, too much fun. Besides, maybe they'll feed one to P-chan!" 

Her companion gasped. "How could you say such a thing!?!" 

The first woman sweatdropped. "Kawaiikune! P-chan equals RYOGA!!!" 

"Er, gomenasai... I know that. Old habits die hard. So we're just going to watch?" 

"Until the cold gets too much to bear." 

Ranma-chan and Akane grinned at each other and turned back to the windows. 

()()()()() 

Okay, okay, this is _quickly_ becoming a Ranma crossover. Not that I mind... I'm just wondering if ya'll mind. I've recently become very obsessed with Ranma, andI couldn't help working it in here... *grins* I'm thinking of bringing Konatsu into this too. He's such a cutie! *giggles* 

Okay, here's the full version of CM's song. It's to the tune of "God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen". 

The bathroom door said 'gentlemen'   
So I just walked right in!   
I'd like to find the creep who had the nerve to switch the signs!   
'Cuz I have two black eyes and one high-heel up my behind,   
Oh, now I'll never sit with comfort and joy,   
Boy oh boy!   
Now I'll never sit with comfort and joy... 

Hm... Ya' know, that's beginning to remind me _a lot_ of Seto and Joey... Can't you just _picture_ Seto switching the male/female signs to get Joey beat up by a bunch of onnas? *snickers* 

Chapter 6: The Ex-Lax is descovered, and Ranma and Akane come inside! But what the hell?! Otogi likes Akane, Mai likes Otogi, Joey likes Mai _and_ Akane _and_ Ranma-chan, but can't stand Ranma-kun. Ranma-kun thinks Hotaru is evil, and Katya is hot, but Katya hates his guts, while Hotaru's in _love_! (If either of you object to this, say so and I'll change it around) Malik likes Ranma-chan and- Hey wait! What are Ukyou and Konatsu doing here? Things are starting to get crowded... Meanwhile, WSJ seeks hot water to turn her beloved P-chan into her even-more-beloved Ryoga. Her beloved, _naked_ Ryoga. Uh oh... 

God bless minna-san! (see my bio for a full explenation of just who "Minna" is) 


	6. Hot Water and Crossdressers

WSJ: *groans* This chapter came about for three reasons. Number one: I am incredably frustrated with _The Child Who Suffers_. It's coming along well, but it's so _long_, and I'm afraid if I break it up into chapters I'll end up not finishing it... 

Numbero Dos: I'm incredably frustrated with my drawings. Do you know how blooming _hard_ it is to get Akane's face right?! 

# 3: I have this incredable urge to write something silly involving Konatsu and Joey... 

WSJ: So that's the reason's I'm writing this. ^_^; I hope you enjoy! Oh, and just so I warn you again, Konatsu and Ryoga are my favorite characters, although I do bash Konatsu a bit... 

()()()()() 

PCHANGE 

Chapter 6 -- Cross-dressers and Hot Water, Joey's _in_ Hot Water 

"Aaarg! Okay, that's it, we're going in! It's too cold out here!!!" 

Akane glanced over at Ranma-chan. "How? All the doors are stuck shut witht he snow, and the hole in the roof was magicly fixed when WSJ opened that rift we fell through." 

Ranma pondered this. "We could blast out way in," 

Akane shook her head. "No good! I doubt WSJ would take kindly to someone blowing her house apart..." 

"You guys want in?" 

The two turned in surprise to see Katya leaning out the livingroom window, which opened inwards and was above the snowline to boot. "Sure!" They chorused, scrambling up and over the sill. 

At the moment, the only ones in the room were Katya, Yami-Malik, Mokuba, and Rosie. Everyone else were off doing their own thing. WSJ wandered in cuddling a small black piglet. A small, black, _familiar_ piglet. 

"Ryoga?" Ranma-chan asked at the same time Akane exclaimed "P-chan!" 

Ryoga gave them annoyed looks, and WSJ grinned. "I was wondering when you two would get inside. Here Ranma, take Ryoga and you two go get changed back to guys." 

Ranma nodded and headed out of the room, gathering Ryoga's clothes from the heap on the floor where they'd been dropped. 

Akane turned questioningly to WSJ. "So, who're all these other people?" 

WSJ groaned and pulled a small legal pad and a pen out of HammerSpace. "I really hate doing this, but it's gonna take too long to explain, and I _do_ have a plot to get on with..." She scribbled something on the pad, and then tossed it back into HammerSpace. "There. All the YGO crew know about you guys, including your curses, and know you know all about them, including their Millenium Items." She grinned. "Cheap plot device I know, but it works." 

Akane blinked, shrugged, and wandered off to talk to Mai. Rosie walked over to her best friend, a vaugly worried look on her face. "WSJ, I can't find your sister or brother _anywhere_." 

WSJ snickered. "I know," 

~~*~~ 

"Hey Feline, where do you think we are?" 

"I dunno, but you might want to watch your-" 

^SPLASH!^ 

"-step..." 

"{Oh... I sorry sir...}" 

~~*~~ 

There was a crazed scramble from the kitchen, and suddenly the door banged open. Ryou, Hotaru, Yugi, Chibi-Malik, Bakura, and two unfamiliar people rushed out, and then stood warily at opposite ends of the room, regarding each other. 

"They came through the window!" Hotaru accused with a shaky finger. 

"So?" one of the women asked. 

WSJ sighed. "Hotaru, it's all right, really. Ranma, Akane, and Ryoga are already here, so I expected that Konatsu and Ukyou wouldn't be far behind. Now all we need is little miss b*tch..." 

"Someone mention Shampoo?" 

WSJ chuckled at Akane. "Yeah, her." 

Ukyou's eyes lit up. "Ranchan's here?!" 

"Yep, he and Ryoga are, er, getting into something more comfortable. Thank you Konatsu," WSJ added as the ninja grabbed the back of Ukyou's collar, preventing her from running into the bathroom to find Ranma. 

At that precise moment, Joey wandered into the room, munching on a candy cane. He spied Konatsu and his eyes lit up. "Why hello pretty lady!" 

Akane, WSJ, and Ukyou stopped short. "But Joey, he's not-" Akane began. 

WSJ held out a hand, grinning from ear to ear. "Stop right there Akane. It's much funnier this way." 

Akane sighed. "If you say so..." 

Konatsu bristled at Joey's words, especially when the blond tried to pinch Konatsu's rear. That was the straw that broke the ninja's back. Konatsu grabbed Joey by the collar and tossed him across the room. "Kuso you! I'm so sick and tired of being mistaken for a frickin' girl!!!" 

"Konatsu," 

The ninja looked over at WSJ. "Hai?" 

"Why don't you just stop dressing like one then?" 

Konatsu looked away. "It's not that easy," he muttered. 

"It's not? Are you sure? Konatsu, come with me for a minute," Konatsu shrugged at Ukyou, who was giving him a questioning look, and followed the authoress to her room. 

Once there, WSJ motioned for Konatsu to sit in the computer chair, and took the bed. "Before you say anything, let me speak. You're scared to stop dressing and acting like a girl, because you don't know how to act like a guy. Your feminity scares you, but it's the fact that you're not macho that scares you even more, am I right?" 

Numbly, Konatsu nodded. 

WSJ smiled sympatheticly. "Ko-chan, it's Christmas Eve. No time for an identity crisis. So just have fun and be yourself, whether it be girl or boy." She leaned forward, and before Konatsu could do anything, she'd placed a gentle kiss on his cheek. And then she was gone, back to her guests with the soft russle of her blue jeans and the faint hint of the lavendar perfume she was wearing. 

Konatsu was in slight shock, and for a long time sat staring at the wall of WSJ's bedroom. _Can it be that- No! I love Ukyou! I love Ukyou! I love **Ukyou**!!! Just because one girl comes along and gives me a kiss, makes me feel understood, I am **not** going to go and throw away the love of my life!_

[She doesn't love you,] a small, traitorous inner voice said. [Ukyou doesn't love you. She loves Ranma. But maybe, just maybe, WSJ loves you,] 

_Insane!_ Konatsu mentally yelled back. _I'll **make** Ukyou love me! I AM NOT FALLING FOR WSJ!!!!!!!!!_

[Yes you are,] 

_Am not!!!_

"Am not what, Konatsu?" 

Konatsu looked up to see Ranma-kun hovering in the doorway, Ryoga just behind him. Konatsu blushed, not having realised he said the last part outloud. "Oh, nothing," 

Ranma shrugged. "If you say so..." 

()()()()() 

WSJ: *sweatdrops as she looks at her own traitorous hands* How does everything I write become a soap opera? Believe me, this'll only get more tangled... Okay, has anyone besides me noticed that the chapter summeries are getting less and less accurate? *sweatdrops again* I try my best, but sometimes these hands type what they want without asking me... 

Chapter 7: Christmas Eve night. Konatsu tries to come to terms with his feelings for himself, Ukyou, and WSJ, and ends up having a talk with Ranma. Santa arrives with presents, but it isn't quite who you think... The presents are good though. Everyone tries to find somewhere to sleep, and the sleeping arrangments are rather... Humerous, to say the least. 

*Warning: I cannot be held responcible for the inacuracy of the above staments* ^.~ 

God bless minna-san! 


	7. Pegasus Clause and Instant Amazon

WSJ: Oi, oi, WSJ have too too big headache... *rubs her head* 

Ranma: *major sweatdrops* Um.... Just _why_ are you talking like Shampoo? 

Bakura: *shakes his head* Chocolate high/hangover. And reading one too many fics about you guys... 

Ryoga: *grumbles* Great, so this is _our_ fault? 

Bakura: Hai. 

Ranma: *sighs* Isn't it always Pork-boy? WSJ don't own YGO or Ranma. She wishes she did. *Konatsu, Ryoga and Ryou sweatdrop* 

()()()()() 

PCHANGE 

Chapter 7: Pegasus-Clause and Instant Amazon 

The two martial artists and one cross-dressing ninja stood looking at each other for a moment, before Ranma and Ryoga glanced at each other. For once in perfect agreement, they stepped inside WSJ's room and Ranma quietly closed the door behind them. Ranma opened his mouth to say something to Konatsu, when Ryoga elbowed him in the side. "Hey, it's... _Us_." 

Ranma and Konatsu both blinked, looking around the room for the first time. "Well I'll be..." Indeed. Covering WSJ's walls were drawings off all sorts, most done by her. Ranma, Ryoga, and Ryou & Bakura seemed to be her favorite subjects, although there were many of various other bishonen as well, including... Mousse?! Over her computer was a huge pin-up of the British actor Orlando Bloom, framed by sketches and other various pictures of him. 

Ryoga sweatdropped. "Jeez, does she have a fetish for this guy, or what?" 

"It's the accent..." Ranma said, eyeing a picture of the Brit in something... reveiling. "K'so, most of these pictures have _got_ to be from the black market..." 

Konatsu made a face. "Nah, just from crazed fangirls like herself. I heard somewhere that there's something like 3,000 websites dedicated to him." 

The other two blinked and stared at him. "Really? Wow..." 

Ranma shook his head in an attempt to get back on subject. "_Any_way, Konatsu-chan, are you sure you're all right? 'Cuz I mean, you really don't look it..." 

Konatsu looked down at his hands. "Well..." 

"Hey, P-chan," Ranma nudged the Lost Boy. "Can you find your way back to the livingroom, or should I help you?" 

Ryoga glared, and Ranma smiled serenly. "I'll be fine," With that, Ryoga promptly left. Amazingly, by the right door (as opposed to the one that led into the closet). 

"What's on your mind?" Ranma asked. "I know I'm not exactly the first person people come to for advice, but I'll do my best." 

"Well, you see Ranma-kun, WSJ's the only person that I've felt really understands me. I mean, Ukyou-sama does, because her situation's almost the exact reverse of mine, but she never really pays attention to me. WSJ, though, really notices me, and makes me actually feel liked. Maybe..." he strained to get the word out. "...Loved. But I feel like I'm betraying Ukyou-sama somehow!" 

Ranma pursed his lips and leaned back in his seat. "Weeeell... It's not really a secret that Ucchan doesn't love you Konatsu-chan. Maybe as a good friend and business partner, yeah. But never as an airen." he didn't even notice using Shampoo's phrase, tossing it out without thinking. 

Konatsu nodded saddly. "Y-yeah, I know. But do you think I should go after WSJ? I mean, she's wonderful! She could have anyone she wanted! I-I just don't know what she thinks of me... I'm so feminine, she probably thinks of me as a sister, not a suitor." 

Ranma was stunned to silence momentarily by the bitterness in Konatsu's voice. "If she really does love you, she'll learn to deal with that. Hell, I've got three women who know about my curse, and love, or rather, 'love' me anyway." 

Konatsu nodded, and leaned over to hug Ranma. "Thank you Ranma-kun." 

Ranma grinned sheepishly. "You're welcome Konatsu-chan, but... Could you let go please?" 

"Gomenasai..." Konatsu paused. "You know, my step-mother once threatened to cut off my head for acting too manly." He grinned mischeiviously, and Ranma groaned at the subtle barb. 

"At least _you_ don't have a mother who threatens to cut off your head if you're too girly..." 

A shout from the livingroom drew the attention of Ranma and Konatsu, who got up and went downstairs to investigate. Pretty much everyone was gathered there, and, just so we have everything strait, here's the tally so far. 

From Domino we have: Yugi, Yami (currently _still_ unconcious), Ryou, Bakura, Malik, Ishtar, Joey, Mai, Seto, Mokuba and... Oh hey, ^-^ That's it! 

Okay, from Nerima (willingly or not), we've got Ranma-kun, Ryoga, Akane, Konatsu, and Ukyou. 

From the various dimentions they claim to have come from (*sweatdrops and whistles innocently*), we have WSJ, Yami-WSJ, SW, Yami-SW, Li, Yami-Li, Hotaru, Katya, and Rosie. Sheesh, it's getting crowded... 

Anyway, they were all squeezed into the livingroom, and staring in facination at the fireplace. There was the sound of grunting, and two booted feet came into view. There was a pause, and then Mokuba looked up at Seto. 

"I _told_ you there was a Santa!" 

"Er..." came a voice from the chimney. "I seem to be stuck..." 

"Oh bloody hell!" Ukyou stompted over and grabbed a boot, yanking the holiday saint out of the flew. He sat there stunned for the moment, and, unfortunatly for him, his beard came unsnapped and drifted to the floor. 

"PEGASUS?! I thought we got rid of you!" 

"Er..." the silver-haired man sweatdroped. "Maybe?" Pegasus was sitting on the hearth wearing a red Santa suit trimmed in white fur. He even had the traditional Santa hat perched on his head. 

The group from Domino (and a couple of the authoresses *coughKatyacough*) were only restrained from violence when another, more annoying voice drifted down the chimney to them. "Flying horse boy all right? Find airen?" 

The Nerima half of the room (and WSJ) groaned. "Oh no..." 

Shampoo appeared in the chimney behind Pegasus, unnoticingly booting him off the hearth as she stepped down. For the moment she didn't notice Ranma as she turned back around to look up the flew. 

The Chinese Amazon was wearing a dress in her traditional style, which is to say, short and releiling, but it was done in red and green with little bells at the end of the sleeves. She yelled up to someone on the roof: "Bring water down now, yes?" 

"Hai," came a voice from above. An instant later Mousse climbed down the chimney, a bucket of water balanced carefully in one hand. "Here you are, Shampoo..." 

Shampoo grinned maliciously as she took the bucket. In one motion she spun around and flung the water at Ranma with a shreik of "Wo ai ne!" Ranma, of course, 'eeped' and ducked, causing the water to splash all over... 

"Er..." Ranma carefully backed away from the wet authoress, who seemed to have frozen solid, her eyes staring at nothing. "Do I want to know what that was...?" 

Shampoo looked like she was about ready to burst into tears, while Mousse was somewhat ecstatic. "It was water from Jusenkyo," 

"Um..." Akane paused before asking, rather nervously, "Which spring?" WSJ hadn't turned into anything different. At least, nothing as drastic as a duck or *shudder* a man. But it could still be almost anything. Spring of the Drowned Magical Girl, Spring of the Drowned Idol Singer, Spring of the Drowned Chibi-Usa... Now _that_ one made Akane shudder. 

"Was Spring of Drowned Amazon," Shampoo said unhappily. "Was going to make Ranma Amazon, so he marry Shampoo!" 

"AAAAAIIIIIIIIIIEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" 

Everyone jumped at the sound of WSJ's screech. "WSJ **Amazon** now?!? WSJ kill Chinese bimbo-girl and duck-boy! Omae wo korosu!" Joey quickly grabbed one of SJ's arms, while Yugi and Ryou latched on to the other to keep her from leaping at the two Chinese. 

"Hey," Ryoga said quietly to Ranma, "Her grammer's the same as Shampoo's, but why's she throwing in Japanese phrases, and not Chinese?" 

Rosie overheard that comment. "Because she can't speak any Chinese other then 'xiexie', 'nihao', and a couple other words. Japanese, on the other hand..." 

Akane blinked. "So she's a Japanese Amazon?" 

They were distracted from their discussion as WSJ pulled a pair of bonbori out of HammerSpace. She socked Joey with one, sending him into the wall for the second time that day. Yugi and Ryou 'eep'ed and let go. They didn't think WSJ would whack them, but in her present state they couldn't be sure. 

WSJ was about to leap at Shampoo, who now had her bonbori out and was ready for combat. Then she seemed to get a better idea, and narrowed her eyes. She stalked over to Shampoo, and, before the Chinese could do anything, gave her the Kiss of Death. 

Ranma and Akane groaned, and the others looked puzzled. "What?" Mai asked, scratching her head and voicing the opinions of all the others. 

"The Kiss of Death," Akane said quietly. "It means that WSJ vows to kill Shampoo, or die trying." 

"_Wonder_ful," Malik sneered. "Why am I not surprised?" 

Of course Mousse, in his half-blind state and standing pretty much on the other side of the room, saw only the vague form of someone leaning over to kiss his beloved Shampoo. 'It must be Ranma!' he thought to himself. 'That half-man is trying to take Shampoo for himself!' 

It may be noted here that Mousse has a screwed sence of logic. 

Then he heard Ranma whispering to Akane, right next to him. 

'I take that back!' he thought reluctantly, and then gasped. 'It's that vile authoress! She's trying to make Shampoo go, _that_ way!' Because, of course, even being an Amazon himself, he did not recognise the Kiss of Death. 

Correction. Mousse has a _very_ screwed sence of logic. And the Kami has a screwed sence of humor, but that was already easily established. 

And so, as WSJ pulled away from giving the shocked Shampoo the Kiss of Death, she was just in time to see Mousse flying at her yelling something along the lines of "I will not have you tarnish Shampoo like that, you evil witch!" 

Thankfully, WSJ seemed to have inherritated the martial arts skills of an Amazon as well. She snorted and ducked under the giant paper fan that Mousse had pulled out of his sleeves. "Baka duck-boy! Somebody get SJ cold water, hai?" She brought an elbow down on the back of Mousse's neck, sending him into the ground. It wasn't technically a martial arts move, more of a wrestling one, but hey, Anything Goes! 

Seto brought in two glasses from the kitchen, one filled with hot water for WSJ, and one with cold. WSJ grabbed both glasses from her, tossing one over the moaning Chinese (reducing him into a quacking Chinese), and pouring the other one over herself. 

Now that they were looking for it, everyone else could see the change. When WSJ got splashed, she got shorter, as Ranma did, and her hair turned a very dark blue, a little lighter then Ukyou's. Her eyes changed from grey to lavendar too. 

The authoress shook water out of her eyes and looked around the livingroom. "Ugh, great, just what I need... I'm gonna go get changed. Ukyou? Would you do us all the honor of making okonomiyaki for supper?" 

The chef bobbed her head 'yes', and an intrested Mai, Hotaru, and SW followed her toward the kitchen. 

WSJ stomped off to her room, muttering about baka Amazons and stupid curses. She glanced at the hall clock as she passed it and froze. "Oh kami, no..." It was almost midnight. They had sleeping arrangements to make. 

WSJ sighed and continued toward her room, now at a slightly more subdued pace. She pondered as she changed into dry clothes, and finally desided that she should just write out the arragements and make everyone else stick to them. She sat down as her desk with a sigh, chewing thoughtfully on the end of her pen. 

After a wonderful supper in which Ukyou outdid herself and Shampoo helpfully supplied ramen, WSJ stood up and 'ahem'ed the table into silence. "As some of you are aware," she began, casting a significant look at Akane and Ryou, whom she'd finally had to call in to help her with the arrangements, "We will all have to sleep somewhere tonight, since we are still snowed in, and we _will_ have to double up, triple up or quadruple up in some cases, in rooms," 

A lot of people had paled at this, and WSJ snickered quietly. She'd actually had fun with this. She picked up the peice of paper sitting next to her plate and carefully kept her face bland as she read from it. 

"All yamis, and I mean _all_ yamis, _will_ be sleeping in their soulrooms. In my room I have me, Hotaru, Ukyou, Akane, and Mai. My little sister's room with house Rosie, Shampoo, Li, and SW. I've got Ranma, Joey, Seto, and Pegasus in my brother's room," she paused here until the outraged yells died down, and the snickers did too. "In my parents room, which I've arranged by gentlness, since I'll be _killed_ if it gets trashed, are Ryou, Yugi, Konatsu, and Mokuba. Mousse, Ryoga, and Malik are in the livingroom." 

With that, she sat back down. 

And then she stood back up, very quickly, in outrage, when Joey casually tossed his glass of water on her. "Joey no baka!" 

"Hey," Seto said mildly, for once in agreement. "It's your fault for putting me, him, _and_ Pegasus in the same room." 

Ranma shuddered. "Yeah, Pegasus makes even Konatsu look manly! Gomen Ko-chan," 

"None taken," Konatsu replied. "Because I think you're right." 

Currently Pegasus was in the corner, giggling something about little pink ponies. Or it could have been little pink panties. One could never tell. 

WSJ shuddered, forgetting her anger at being splashed and sitting back down, desided to stay in her cursed form so she could get used to the extra strength and horrible grammer she wasn't used to having. "Kuso! WSJ hope too too much that Flying-Horse Boy never meet Panty-Raid Man." 

"Eep," Ranma eeped. "Don't mention him! With my luck he's likely to show up!" 

"Who?" Akane asked, cocking her head. "Master Happo-" she was cut off as Ranma and Ryoga slapped their hands over her mouth. All was silent for a moment. 

And then, echoing over the snow, and through the driving wind that was still blowing... 

A faint cry of "Sweeto!" 

Ranma began to bang his head against the wall repeatedly. Ryoga groaned. WSJ and Akane looked mildly annoyed. Ukyou reached for her spatula. 

And Pegasus? 

Pegasus grinned. 

"Master!" 

Ranma redoubled his efforts on getting his head to punch through the wall. 

()()()()() 

Ryoga: Will Happosai drive the women up the wall with his constant carresses? Will WSJ learn to handle her Amazon curse? What does this mean for Konatsu's love? 

Bakura: And most importantly, will a certain authoress _who shall remain unnamed_ ever turn the focus back to us poor, ignored YGO charas? 

WSJ: *sweatdrop* WSJ hurt... 

Chapter 8: Happosai shows up. And, after one look at Mai, he's in heaven. Of course, Joey's about to kill 'im! Everyone goes to bed, but it seems that WSJ's cat, Lance, who has been hiding all day, desides that Ranma's bed is a very comfortable place to sleep... 

God bless minna-san! 


	8. Perverts, Dimentional Knives, and a Lost...

Disclaimer: No own. No claim to own. So there. 

WSJ: Ugh! This story is beginning to frustrate me!!! I'm thinking about just plain discontinuing it! 

Bakura: *perks up* No more pain and suffering for us?! Do tell! 

WSJ: *gives him a hard look* Not so fast, I still have SoS you know... 

Bakura: *gulps, mutters* Hai, itsuji... 

WSJ: ^-^! 

Bakura: -.-; 

WSJ: Anyway, I'm thinking about breaking this story off because A) it's not Christmas anymore and I'm getting bored, B) this thing has no real plot, and C) I have no idea where it's going to go. Plus, I suck at writing humor! _Angst and drama_ are my forte! 

Bakura: *snorts* I'll say... Ryou and I have learned that the HARD way... 

WSJ: *sighs* I'll write this chapter, at least, and see what comes of it... 

()()()()() 

PCHANGE 

Chapter 8 -- Perverts, Dimentional Knives, and Nekos 

As the cries of 'Sweeto!' got closer, Ranma stopped off banging his head on the wall and instead began to dash around franticly. "He might try to come down the chimney! We should build a fire! SJ-" 

"SJ on it!" WSJ said, saluting and running for the woodbox out in the garage. 

Ranma nodded. "Right! So now all we gotta do is put all the girls' panties and things in a safe! Oh, and-" She stopped, sighed, and spit out a mouthful of water as Mai casually threw her water glass at him. "What was that for?" 

Mai snorted. "I've kinda noticed that this "Happosai" is less then nice to the female gender. If we suffer, you suffer." 

Ranma snorted. "Oh gee, thanks," 

There was a sudden howl from the livingroom, and WSJ walked in, holding a rather singed Happosai by the collar. Of course, the old pervert was staring longingly at her chest, and had even begun to drool a little. WSJ chose to ignore the fact. "Ranma no have to worry about old letcher man. WSJ throw him into void!" 

There was a collective silence as the cast of two shows tried to put two and two together... 

"Huh?" 

...And, of course, came up with seven. 

WSJ sighed. "Spatula-girl hold old letcher man for WSJ?" 

Ukyou seemed to ponder this, then shrugged and took Happosai, holding him by the back of his collar at arms' length, like WSJ had been. WSJ first heated some water, turning herself back to normal with a happy sigh. 

WSJ then reached back over one shoulder, as if she were going to draw an arrow out of a quiver. Instead, she pulled a long hunting knife out of seemingly no where. 

Everyone oogled at her, and she grinned. "Oh come on now, how many times have I told you that I'm a princess from an alternate dimention? This thing's an old family heirloom." 

Everyone continued to stare, although (of course) neither Ryou nor Malik looked really surprised. In fact, Malik sat up and cocked his head at her. "I thought it got destroyed when the armory collapsed." 

WSJ shook her head. "Most of 'em did, but Nanna was wearing this one, and threw it at me when I went to escape. " 

Ryou blinked. "She threw a knife at a four-year-old?" 

"No baka! Figure of speech!" WSJ looked around, noting the apprehensive and puzzled expretions on peoples faces. She sighed again, and exchanged looks with Malik and Ryou. "Okay, crash course in Tandaarran history... King Henshu married, and had three sons, named Duo, Raven, and Malik," she waved vaguly at the blond. "The wife died giving birth to Malik. So, since she hadn't produced an heir (Tandaarrah is ruled by the females), he remarried. This wife gave him a son, and then a daughter," she motioned to Ryou and herself. "Very long story short, Tandaarrah was attacked, and the five royal children, ie, Ryou, Malik, Raven, Duo, and I, were sent to different dimentions to be protected." 

Ryou chuckled at the stunned expressions on the faces around him, save those of Yugi and Ryoga. "The knife SJ? And the nobles?" 

"Ah yes, some of the more noble lords were able to escape Tandarrah's take-over, and also left for other dimentions," she pointed at Yugi, then Ryoga, who looked a little sheepish as their comrades stared at them. 

"Anyway, there's a lot more I could go into, but basicly, this is a Dimention Knife. I can use it to cut through the fabric of reality. So, I just open a tear to an enpty realm, like so," And with that, she stabbed the knife into thin air... And the blade disappeared. She then pulled the knife downward, and with a gentle ripping sound, a black hole appeared in the middle of the air. Carefully keeping the kife in the tear, WSJ took Happosai from Ukyou and tossed him through. She then pulled out the knife, and with a quiet 'bang' the tear healed itself. 

WSJ inserted the knife back into its pocketspace and dusted off her hands. "There we go! All done." 

Ranma looked stunned. "No more Happosai?! No more old pervert getting me in trouble?!" A gleeful smile spread over her face, and then her eyes rolled back in her head in a dead faint. 

WSJ sighed. "Maybe that's a cue for bed-time, hai?" 

()()()()() 

WSJ: Alright! THAT'S IT!!!! I've got too much else to worry about without this too!!! Who knows, maybe I'll continue it next Christmas. *sighs* I am working on a Ranma story though, called _Roads Less Traveled_, that could be considered a 'sequel' to this. Anyway, ja! 

God bless minna-san! 


End file.
